


For You I Can be Brave

by DaronwyK



Series: What if... HP Drabbles & Short Stories [28]
Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Book 4: Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-04-22
Updated: 2018-04-22
Packaged: 2019-04-26 02:27:27
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,160
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14392299
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DaronwyK/pseuds/DaronwyK
Summary: What did it take for Severus to got to the Dark Lord after the Third Task, knowing nearly certain death was waiting for him?





	For You I Can be Brave

**Author's Note:**

> One-Shot, character study of the mind of a spy.

**o.o.O.o.o**

**Being Brave means to know that something is scary,**

**difficult, and dangerous and doing it anyway.**

**Because the possibility of winning the fight**

**is worth the chance of losing it.**

**-Emilie Autumn**

**o.o.O.o.o**

Severus opened the black trunk at the back of his closet with trepidation. Merlin, how he had prayed that the contents protected within would never again see the light of day, and remain relegated to his darkest dreams. He cast the complicated unlocking charm, and the brass latch opened with a reluctant sigh. Sitting on the top of a pile of black fabric was a bone-white mask, and it took everything inside him to reach out and pick it up. The searing pain in his left forearm was nothing to the knowledge of what this mask represented, and what taking it up again would mean. The tattered remnants of his soul would not survive this time, he knew that. He’d barely emerged from the last war with some semblance of self; this second wave would finish him.

 

The realization was meaningless. He would do what he had to; there was no other choice. He would not run like the coward Karkaroff. Severus Snape was many things, but he had never been a coward. Albus had known all too well that he was likely sending him to his death tonight, and he hoped at least some small part of the old Headmaster felt guilt over that, but he doubted it. They all had their parts to play in the coming days. Severus pulled on the achingly familiar billowing robes of his Death Eater days, and slipped the mask into his pocket. He fastened his potion’s case to the inner pocket, and gathered his very best occlumency shields around his mind as he slipped through the dungeons like a ghost.

 

He had not come when called, and there was always a price to be paid for that. Facing the Dark Lord after so long would be terrifying, and, if he were honest, a little exhilarating. He had mouldered away in the dungeons of Hogwarts for so long, devoid of challenges in his life, his superior skills and mind left underappreciated and unused. This would be the ultimate test of his abilities: to lie to the greatest Legilimens the world had ever known. Albus might consider himself on par with the Dark Lord, but Severus had been subjected to the skills of both men and in his experience there was simply no comparison. While the Headmaster employed more stealth in his approach to the mental arts, the Dark Lord’s pure ability meant that he rarely needed to concern himself with subtlety. Lying to Albus was child’s play compared to what awaited him at the other end of this punishing call.

 

Like a piece of living shadow, Severus slipped out of a secret passage from the dungeons to the edge of the Forbidden Forest. His feet found the edge of the Castle’s wards with ease, and settling the mask over his face, he answered his Master’s call. He fell to his knees instantly and bowed his head low, the image of a contrite and repentant supplicant. It took every ounce of his nerve to remain so vulnerable before a man who had every reason to kill him. His supposed defection to the Light was a matter of public record, as he had remained faithfully at Dumbledore’s side all these years. No, death was the best outcome he could hope for. It was far more likely he’d die a long, agonizing death as a lesson to the others. There was only the smallest chance he would leave this place alive, and it did no good to think about it.

 

“Ah…Severus, I had hoped you would not entertain the folly of running.” The smooth voice of Lord Voldemort curled through the night, soft as silk and deadly as poison.

 

“I have never been a fool, my Lord.” Severus responded, keeping perfectly still.

 

“Only a fool would have betrayed me, and been so open about it. CRUCIO!”

 

The curse struck him, and Severus collapsed to the ground with pain searing into his very bones. He remained mostly silent, but finally a scream of agony clawed its way past his lips and then, just as suddenly as it had begun, the curse ended. Severus laid there, gasping in pain for a long moment before shakily hauling himself back up onto his knees.

 

“I never betrayed you, my Lord. I remain your loyal servant. I stayed close to your enemy, convinced him I was his, and learned his secrets. I did this for you, only for you, Master,” he said, forcing the words out and trying to keep the tremble of fear from his tone. Fear had no place here, it would only get him killed faster.

 

“But can I believe you? So many years have passed Severus…how can I be certain?” Voldemort approached and fisted a hand in Severus’ hair, pulling his neck back awkwardly, tearing away his mask and sending it spinning into the dark.  

 

“You know my heart my Lord. You’ve always known,” Severus said, black eyes meeting crimson. “My bones are stained black, and I have no love for the doddering old fool nor his ideals. Kill me if you must, but know that I have always been your loyal servant and always will be.” He put every ounce of conviction he had into those words, stripping his soul bare to the monster that had claim on it.

 

The mental attack came without hesitation, tearing into his mind like a thousand serrated knives. Severus knew better than to resist, and allowed the man to see everything he needed to. His hate for James Potter’s son, the fury at being forced to remain at Hogwarts by the Headmaster to teach little fools year after mind-numbing year, and the longing in his soul for the darkness that he’d been denied access to for so long. None of these things were a lie, but neither were they the whole truth. The Dark Lord lingered over the fate of Barty Crouch Jr for a long moment, seeming almost regretful of the loss. He was released after what felt like an eternity, and he waited for the final blow to come.

 

“It seems you speak the truth. Such loyalty will be rewarded in time. Rise Severus, take your rightful place.”

 

Severus stood, even as pain sang along his nerves, and moved to stand at the Dark Lord’s side. Somehow, against the very direst of odds, he was alive. He had lied, bold-faced and unashamed to the Dark Lord and lived through it. It was the first test of many, but he would take what victories he could. His oath to Lily was his only purpose now, he would find a way to keep her son alive…no matter the cost.

  


For Lily, he could be brave.


End file.
